In a perfect world, all managers would adopt a mentorship mindset. But we live in the real, decidedly imperfect world. Plenty of managers simply get the work done and call it a day. They make sure their team is executing well, but unlike mentor-minded managers, they don’t take much interest in preparing their people to meet new challenges or take advantage of new opportunities.
It doesn’t take a fancy algorithm to predict which type of manager has higher-performing teams – or higher performance ratings at annual review time.
The catch is that mentorship isn’t a one-size-fits-all proposition. True, some mentoring tips apply across the board. We’ll save you an internet search and give you the highlight reel here:
- Consistency: Meet on a regular cadence, but also be open to ad-hoc sessions as events warrant.
- Active listening: Clear your head and really tune in when you meet with your mentee. Silence your phone and close your laptop to minimize distractions. Take notes and ask clarifying questions as you go.
- Constructive feedback: Critique alone isn’t enough. Offer tangible suggestions for how your mentee might move forward after a setback or do something differently next time.
- Appropriate challenges: Push your mentee to stretch beyond their comfort zone, but do so empathetically. Their circumstances and/or personality might limit what they’re able or willing to do.
- Optimism (balanced with realism): For the most part, it’s best to stay positive and focus on empowering your mentee. But sometimes things just don’t work out. A bit of real talk from you can help them recognize when it’s time to cut their losses and try a new approach.
But to make a deep impact on the people you’re managing, you have to adapt the way you mentor each individual. Some will be easy to work with, while mentoring others may be less straightforward. Drawing upon our own experience, plus some helpful resources from the folks at Global Mentor Network and Together, we spun up this guide to understanding common mentee archetypes and how to approach a mentor-mentee relationship with each one.
Mentee archetypes and what they need from you
Side note: although we’re looking through the lens of a manager working with their direct reports, everything below is applicable to a wide variety of situations. So if you’re mentoring someone in your capacity as a teacher, professor, coach, senior colleague, friend, or relative, you’re still in the right place.
1. The star performer
Who they are: ambitious; focused on career development; organized and detail-oriented.
What they need: guidance on priorities.
This mentee has motivation on lock. If anything, they need reminders to pace themselves so they don’t flame out. Your role is to help them identify clear, achievable goals and break them down into milestones. Hold them accountable and help them get back on track if they stray. With so much drive and curiosity, they can find themselves spread too thin if they don’t stay focused on their “North Star.” But you should also coach them to be patient with themselves (they tend to struggle with this!) and shush their inner critic if it starts talking too loud. And be ready with the high-fives when they hit a milestone. Star performers love some external validation.
2. The diamond in the rough
Who they are: loads of unrealized potential; prone to mistakes (both the honest and careless variety); tends to be open and curious, but not necessarily outgoing or extraverted.
What they need: a sparring partner.
Diamonds in the rough don’t always have a clear sense of what they ultimately want to become. Strategy-focused executive? Rockstar in their craft? Could go either way! You can help lend structure to their explorations by connecting them with opportunities to enhance existing skills or learn new ones. Challenge and shape their thinking as they tackle projects that stretch their abilities. You might also introduce them to people in your network who can help steer their development.
3. The bootstrapper
Who they are: highly independent; want to do it all themselves so they can do it their way; not interested in advice on smaller, everyday matters.
What they need: inspiration and introspection.
Bootstrappers are passionately self-guided, self-motivated, and self-propelled, which can be challenging for a mentorship-minded manager. Because they prefer to set their own goals, your job is to expose them to possibilities and then let them decide how (and whether) they want to get there. The other way you can make an impact is to help them tune into strengths they may not have recognized in themselves and identify weaknesses to shore up. Help them be the best version of themselves, and they’ll build their best career.
4. The know-it-all
Who they are: older than their manager, or with more industry experience; engaged in their career; may already have a mentor outside the team.
What they need: solidarity.
Don’t take it personally, but this person isn’t sure they can learn much from you. After all, they’ve clocked more years in this field than you have. What could a newbie like you have to offer? The answer is partnership. Rather than helping to steer their career, focus on connecting them with projects that further the goals they already have. Also, offer yourself up as a resource for navigating tricky workplace situations like conflict with a colleague or budget cuts. You might even suggest “reverse mentoring,” where they coach you on an area you’d like to improve.
5. The straggler
Who they are: under-performer with untapped potential; delivers work late; quality of work lags behind the rest of the team.
What they need: a roadmap to success.
There are a million reasons this person might be struggling. Your first task is to find out why. Are difficulties in their personal life getting in the way? A new baby or serious illness in the family can wreak havoc on job performance, for example. Or perhaps this just isn’t the right role for them. Once you’ve identified the root cause together, co-create an improvement plan or transition plan with milestones and target dates. Celebrate their progress along the way. Hold them accountable if they slip, but counterbalance your constructive criticism with unconditional compassion.
6. The raw nerve
Who they are: sensitive; prone to becoming defensive; may respond to critique with anger or despair.
What they need: compassion and confidence.
Be on the lookout for signs of impostor syndrome with this person. Chances are, they feel like they’re in over their head in terms of their abilities, or overwhelmed by their workload. The key here is to acknowledge their feelings without being judgmental. Start by asking them what they perceive as their biggest hurdles and work together on a plan to overcome or work around them. Keep it genuine – don’t overly praise mediocre work – but be liberal with positive feedback to help boost their confidence. Bonus points if you can give them recognition in a public space, like a team meeting or Slack channel.
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Two mentorship pitfalls to avoid
Leaning into mentorship will help you grow as a leader. It also helps your team members grow, which, of course, is a hallmark of good leadership. But before you embark on this journey, there are a couple of hazards to be aware of.
First, be crystal clear on the scope of what you can provide, for your own benefit as well as your mentees’. It’s all too easy to overextend yourself, especially if you naturally gravitate toward a servant leadership style. Once your mentee comes to expect that intense level of involvement from you, it’s really hard to walk it back.
Establish boundaries early on, and be specific. For example, you won’t write that project proposal for them, but would be happy to provide feedback on their drafts. Or, you’ll listen to their frustrations with a colleague and offer suggestions, but you won’t rush over to speak to that person’s manager about it.
The second comes from researcher, author, and icon Brené Brown: understand how to use guilt appropriately, but avoid shaming. The difference is that guilt tells us we’ve made a mistake and need to do better, whereas shame makes us feel unworthy of success.
So when a team member messes up, talk about it in terms of their actions or behaviors, not in terms of them as a person – “that was the wrong decision” versus “you’re a poor decision-maker.” As Brown notes, shame is more likely to spawn or exacerbate problems than it is to solve them.
Now get out there and help somebody be awesome today!
How do you approach mentorship? Chime in on the Atlassian Community!